So over the past few weeks, my high school friends have gotten into a huge fight. Like, very huge. Like, all of them are involved in it, and it's escalated to the point of police involvement. And you know what? I'm sick and tired of it.
Seriously. You are not in high school anymore. You are grown-ups. All of you are older than me by at least a year, for pity's sake. The pettiness and gossip and "he said/she said" stuff was okay back in high school, but now some of you are in college, and the others have jobs in the real world. Just because she's marrying your ex, doesn't mean that she took him away from you. You guys haven't even dated in six months. And as for you, just because she's spreading vicious rumors and talking bad about you doesn't mean you have to threaten her. Once again, I'll repeat. You are adults. This is a major life change for one of you- she's about to get married! And you should be happy for her, not trying to turn her friends against her like we're freshmen again.
Don't drag me in the middle of it, at any rate. There's enough drama in college for me to deal with drama from my past. These are my thoughts on the matter- She was wrong to threaten you, yes. And conversely, you were wrong to say all the shit you said and do all the shit you did. I am going to her wedding, because she's a good friend of mine and I want to celebrate the start of a new life for her. I'm not going to listen to anyone's side of the story anymore. It's over, it's done with, MOVE THE HELL ON.
This whole thing has made me look at my own life a lot. I've wasted a lot of my time in the past few months worrying about the Darcy guy and having petty fights with him and such... and now I realize that I was acting no better than all my old friends are right now.
Sunday, November 18, 2007
Friday, November 9, 2007
What Elizabeth would like in a man
So, I was actually planning on doing this before I saw Jane's post. But I figured, why not copy her. It's the sincerest form of flattery, right?
1. Someone who, above all else, shares the same beliefs and overall values as me. That might sound bad to some people, but to me, it just makes sense. If I'm going to spend the rest of my life with someone, I want it to be with someone who has the same kind of ideas and beliefs. But not all the same, because then there would be nothing to discuss. So I should say, mostly the same, but with enough variety to argue about.
2. Someone who makes me laugh. Very cliche and corny, I know, but it's simple and true. I love to laugh, and if you can make me laugh, you can win my heart.
3. Someone who will engage in lively debate and challenge my mind. This kind of goes along with number 1... it's no fun if two people share all the same ideas and beliefs, of course, and I do love a challenge.
4. Someone who trusts me, and at the same time is trustworthy himself. Trust is a really big issue with me... I've been through a lot in my life, and a few times I've placed my trust in people who have let me down. I very much value trust.
5. Someone who has the delicate balance of humility and confidence, kindness and outgoingness, someone who's brave but nice, someone who's intelligent but not condescending. You know the kind of balanced personality I mean. Like Henry from Ugly Betty.
6. Someone who I can rely on when I'm sick or sad, and won't get upset or fed up with me if I am sick or sad. Sometimes I just get blue and need to wallow in glorious melancholy. So I need someone who understands that, and maybe realize that putting on Beauty and the Beast is the perfect cure.
7. Someone who can tolerate my general craziness. Yes, I sometimes do stupid things like walk into doors and fall on my face, and sometimes I get obsessed with the most random of things, like a movie or a song. I'm just a little insane sometimes, but in a good way. So I need someone who not only tolerates that, but likes it as well.
8. Someone who accepts me for who I am, good and bad, but also tends to bring out the better parts of me.
9. Someone who probably shares the same career as me. I agree with what Jane said in her post, but unfortunately, my job will involve a lot of travel and a lot of adventure, and I need someone who can go along with me on that. A fellow traveler and companion.
10. Someone who's cute- to me. There's got to be some attraction there... not that I go for looks over brain and personality, but there has to be some kind of chemistry. Also, preferably someone taller than me.
11. Someone who loves music and old books. I would love it if he had interests of his own as well, but if he doesn't like music and old books, it just won't work.
12. Someone who will accept the fact that every weekend, there needs to be a two hour block where I will watch Pride and Prejudice. He is more than welcome to join me. But there definitely has to be room for Mr. Darcy in my life.
13. Someone who can cook. I can cook, and I'm pretty damn good at it, but I love it when a guy cooks for me. It's just hot.
14. Someone who loves dogs. That's a must. An absolute must.
15. Someone who's smart. I'm not a snob- I just would love being able to discuss the really weird things I know with the one I love. And if he were interested in the same area or worked in the same career, we'd be able to discuss those things. But at the same time, he can't be condescending or view me as inferior.
1. Someone who, above all else, shares the same beliefs and overall values as me. That might sound bad to some people, but to me, it just makes sense. If I'm going to spend the rest of my life with someone, I want it to be with someone who has the same kind of ideas and beliefs. But not all the same, because then there would be nothing to discuss. So I should say, mostly the same, but with enough variety to argue about.
2. Someone who makes me laugh. Very cliche and corny, I know, but it's simple and true. I love to laugh, and if you can make me laugh, you can win my heart.
3. Someone who will engage in lively debate and challenge my mind. This kind of goes along with number 1... it's no fun if two people share all the same ideas and beliefs, of course, and I do love a challenge.
4. Someone who trusts me, and at the same time is trustworthy himself. Trust is a really big issue with me... I've been through a lot in my life, and a few times I've placed my trust in people who have let me down. I very much value trust.
5. Someone who has the delicate balance of humility and confidence, kindness and outgoingness, someone who's brave but nice, someone who's intelligent but not condescending. You know the kind of balanced personality I mean. Like Henry from Ugly Betty.
6. Someone who I can rely on when I'm sick or sad, and won't get upset or fed up with me if I am sick or sad. Sometimes I just get blue and need to wallow in glorious melancholy. So I need someone who understands that, and maybe realize that putting on Beauty and the Beast is the perfect cure.
7. Someone who can tolerate my general craziness. Yes, I sometimes do stupid things like walk into doors and fall on my face, and sometimes I get obsessed with the most random of things, like a movie or a song. I'm just a little insane sometimes, but in a good way. So I need someone who not only tolerates that, but likes it as well.
8. Someone who accepts me for who I am, good and bad, but also tends to bring out the better parts of me.
9. Someone who probably shares the same career as me. I agree with what Jane said in her post, but unfortunately, my job will involve a lot of travel and a lot of adventure, and I need someone who can go along with me on that. A fellow traveler and companion.
10. Someone who's cute- to me. There's got to be some attraction there... not that I go for looks over brain and personality, but there has to be some kind of chemistry. Also, preferably someone taller than me.
11. Someone who loves music and old books. I would love it if he had interests of his own as well, but if he doesn't like music and old books, it just won't work.
12. Someone who will accept the fact that every weekend, there needs to be a two hour block where I will watch Pride and Prejudice. He is more than welcome to join me. But there definitely has to be room for Mr. Darcy in my life.
13. Someone who can cook. I can cook, and I'm pretty damn good at it, but I love it when a guy cooks for me. It's just hot.
14. Someone who loves dogs. That's a must. An absolute must.
15. Someone who's smart. I'm not a snob- I just would love being able to discuss the really weird things I know with the one I love. And if he were interested in the same area or worked in the same career, we'd be able to discuss those things. But at the same time, he can't be condescending or view me as inferior.
What Jane would like in a man
--in no particular order:
1) Someone who will sing me to sleep at night. I know this sounds childish, but I think it would be really sweet to have someone who--no matter the distance between you or the surroundings--doesn't care if he makes an ass in front of himself if it makes you happy. Plus, guys who sing are super sexy, indeed.
2) Someone who understands that, no matter how much I love them, there are times where I'm just going to need space and alone time. Yes, I am selfish. I was an only child, so I'm not very good at sharing and it would be nice to have someone who understands that and perhaps feels the same way.
3) Someone who believes in me as much as I believe in myself--no matter how ridiculous or cliche my goals seem. I would believe in him and his potential, so I'd like that in return.
4) Someone who--despite how intimidating I can be--doesn't show that he's intimidated by me and knows that, at the end of the day, I'm still the me he fell in love with and my accomplishments haven't gone to my head.
5) Someone who's not afraid of being publicly affectionate--for whatever reason. No matter the reason, it would make me feel like he was embarrassed of me, and I would never want to be with someone who didn't consider me a prize.
6) Someone I can talk to about things like literature and film and video games and politics and anything I want to talk about. I like to talk and I always have things swimming around inside my head, so it would be nice to have someone who could see where I was coming from--or that appreciated my randomness.
7) Someone spontaneous and adventurous--who isn't afraid to try new things. I like to get in the car and drive to no place in particular. I like to travel and get out and see things and experience new tastes and sights and sounds. I want adventure and not just resorts when I go on vacation. I want Moroccan food instead of McDonalds. I want to hike to the top of the mountain instead of drive.
8) Someone who isn't in the same profession as I am. I'm a competitive person and I don't want that to ruin a relationship because I'm struggling to out-do the man I love. I want someone who isn't going to be any type of doctor--preferably someone who isn't even a biologist. I need someone to fulfill and live my passions like literature and archaeology because I won't get to do that, but if they did, it would be comforting to hear about it.
9) There's a million and one other things I could list, but most of all, I just want someone I can be comfortable around, someone who doesn't make me nervous or feel stupid or wistful. I want someone who's on my level and looking for the same things I'm looking for. Someone who isn't in a rush to get somewhere--esp. in the relationship.
1) Someone who will sing me to sleep at night. I know this sounds childish, but I think it would be really sweet to have someone who--no matter the distance between you or the surroundings--doesn't care if he makes an ass in front of himself if it makes you happy. Plus, guys who sing are super sexy, indeed.
2) Someone who understands that, no matter how much I love them, there are times where I'm just going to need space and alone time. Yes, I am selfish. I was an only child, so I'm not very good at sharing and it would be nice to have someone who understands that and perhaps feels the same way.
3) Someone who believes in me as much as I believe in myself--no matter how ridiculous or cliche my goals seem. I would believe in him and his potential, so I'd like that in return.
4) Someone who--despite how intimidating I can be--doesn't show that he's intimidated by me and knows that, at the end of the day, I'm still the me he fell in love with and my accomplishments haven't gone to my head.
5) Someone who's not afraid of being publicly affectionate--for whatever reason. No matter the reason, it would make me feel like he was embarrassed of me, and I would never want to be with someone who didn't consider me a prize.
6) Someone I can talk to about things like literature and film and video games and politics and anything I want to talk about. I like to talk and I always have things swimming around inside my head, so it would be nice to have someone who could see where I was coming from--or that appreciated my randomness.
7) Someone spontaneous and adventurous--who isn't afraid to try new things. I like to get in the car and drive to no place in particular. I like to travel and get out and see things and experience new tastes and sights and sounds. I want adventure and not just resorts when I go on vacation. I want Moroccan food instead of McDonalds. I want to hike to the top of the mountain instead of drive.
8) Someone who isn't in the same profession as I am. I'm a competitive person and I don't want that to ruin a relationship because I'm struggling to out-do the man I love. I want someone who isn't going to be any type of doctor--preferably someone who isn't even a biologist. I need someone to fulfill and live my passions like literature and archaeology because I won't get to do that, but if they did, it would be comforting to hear about it.
9) There's a million and one other things I could list, but most of all, I just want someone I can be comfortable around, someone who doesn't make me nervous or feel stupid or wistful. I want someone who's on my level and looking for the same things I'm looking for. Someone who isn't in a rush to get somewhere--esp. in the relationship.
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